


All i want is just one hug from you

by bluesanie, Yukino1612



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Exhaustion, I'm sorry Wooyoung acts a little mean in here, Injury, M/M, Major Character Injury, One Shot, but he's an angel and i love him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2020-10-05 20:21:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20494763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesanie/pseuds/bluesanie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yukino1612/pseuds/Yukino1612
Summary: Sometimes all you need is a hug from the person you love the most and San needs exactly that when all his insecurities are crashing down on him.His boyfriend doesn't seem to worry about it though. Letting San suffer alone.Is Mingi really that much more important to him than San is?





	All i want is just one hug from you

It was a bad day. Everything hurt, everything went wrong and on top of that Wooyoung seemed to like spending his time with Mingi rather than with San. He knew that he could just go to his boyfriend and ask him to pay attention to him, but he didn't want to seem to be too clingy. After all Wooyoung has a life outside of their relationship. But still, it's moments like these, when he stayed behind to practice for too long and felt his body protesting against his every movement, when even breathing hurt, that he really wanted to be in his loving boyfriends arm and be reassured that everything was going to be okay. Because even if he was an idol and even if he had so many fans, he was still just human like all the others. He was a human being, trying to be perfect for his members and fans.

After ten minutes that felt like an hour of lying motionless on the floor of the dance practice room, he decided to get up, pack his things and head home for the day seeing as it was already 11 at night and he promised Hongjoong that he would be home by 9pm. Not that he was gonna be home to check if he kept his promise anyways with how much their leader was working. He kept telling the members not to stay too long, to get some rest before another day of mostly exhausting schedules started but never did it himself. Not even did he listen to Seonghwa. 

When San stepped into the dorms he could hear Mingi laughing with Wooyoung and was immediately overcome with some form of Jealousy. He took a deep breath and went to his room to drop his bag, get a change of clothes and go take a much needed warm -preferably hot- shower. After his shower he felt cleaner and at least a little bit better, even if nothing could possibly compare to the comfort his boyfriend could offer him. Just thinking about Wooyoung brought tears into San's eyes, made him think about just how much he needed him right now to soothe his frayed nerves and insecurities. Standing in front of the mirror, looking at his wet hair and hearing Mingi's and Wooyoung's laugh filling the dorm, he let a tear slip out of the corner of his eye as a silent sob escaped his lips.

After laying in bed, silently crying whilst debating with himself whether it would be a good idea to finally ask Wooyoung for help like the latter had told him to do on multiple occasions when Mingi laughed exceptionally loud and just like that, the courage he had been building up dissipated into thin air. It took San another hour of listening to the pair and letting the tears soak his pillow before he finally got up, washed his face to get rid of the evidence that he had been crying and made his way to the room Wooyoung was in with Mingi. 

He saw them sitting with their back to him. „Wooyoung?“, he called out softly. Wooyoung was seemingly ignoring him in order to finish telling Mingi whatever they were talking about. „Wooyoung“, this time San made sure to get their attention. When they turned towards him, he could see surprise on Mingi‘s face and was that annoyance on Wooyoung's? He decided to not let it get to him. „Could I talk to you for a second?“ „Can‘t you see that I‘m talking to Mingi right now? Seriously is it too much to ask to be able to have just one full conversation in this dorm?“, asked Wooyoung with annoyance now clearly in his voice. San recoiled at his tone, his insecurities immediately hitting him again full force. „Ah, sorry... I just- it’s not important anyways. I’m sorry for interrupting your conversation. I‘ll just... go.... yeah, I‘ll just do that now...“, San slowly backed out of the room, putting on Shoes and telling Seonghwa that he was going for a walk and that he would be back later. „Be careful and don’t forget your phone!“, reprimanded the older. And so, after taking his phone, wallet and keys San left the dorm, feeling more upset than when he was in the practice room.

San wandered aimlessly around the neighborhood, looking at the stars and the moon when they were visible. Thinking back to those rare nights when him and Wooyoung were taking long walks after their practice was over. How Wooyoung always told him how much he loved the stars... and San. He wiped away another tear at that thought. Eventually he found a bench in the park that was about half an hour away from their home where he sat on one of the swings and silently cried, like some female Korean drama lead. At some point he started shivering but his tears just wouldn't stop. He didn't even know how much time had passed but the next time he looked onto his phone he saw that he had a few missed calls and texts from the other members, but none of them were from Wooyoung, his boyfriend, the one whose calls and texts would actually mean something. He was cold, freezing even. It was actually quite warm outside, maybe the feeling of his heart freezing when Wooyoung gave him the cold shoulder wasn’t just a feeling at all. He sat there, cold and alone, waiting for his heart to shatter into a million pieces. This, being treated like he was a bother, like he wasn’t worthy of his boyfriend's time when he needed him, when he felt like he was drowning in insecurities and exhaustion, this was the absolute worst feeling that he had hoped he would never have to experience. His mind was starting to cloud over with dark thoughts, darkness threatening to take him over. He then realized that this was actually dangerous, and no matter how left alone he felt by his boyfriend, even if he was truly being a bother now, he decide that he couldn’t just let his thoughts overwhelm him like this and possibly endanger himself like this, so before he fully understood what he was doing he had already dialed his boyfriend's number. But the younger wasn't answering his phone. San sighed as he looked at the time. 3:12am. 

Opening the door, San entered the dorm, shivering and sniffling. He was so fixated on the dull ache in his head that he didn't even register Seonghwa and Yunho hurrying up to him. „Sanie!” „San, are you okay?”, the one in question looked up, eyes red and puffy. The elders were quick to entangle their broken member in a tight hug. „What were you thinking? Staying out this late without answering your phone? Yunho and I were worried sick!”, scolded Seongwha but San could hear the concern in his voice as clear as his heart shattering. Wooyoung didn't notice his disappearance. Or didn't care. Whatever it was, it broke the last part of San's heart.

„W-Where's Wooyoung?”, he whispered, shakily. „He fell asleep on the couch with Mingi.”, said Yunho with a small smile. San felt tears pricking at his eyes again and quickly made his way to his room, leaving Seonghwa and Yunho behind. Just as he closed the door, he started to sob uncontrollably. Letting his tears flow freely because yes, Mingi was apparently more important to Wooyoung than San was. He felt pathetic for crying about the lack of attention from his boyfriend but it wasn't his fault that he really needed Wooyoung to comfort him right now. Wooyoung. And only Wooyoung.

**Author's Note:**

> i totally did not write this out of the blue no...  
*runs away*  
...  
*comes back*
> 
> btw @yukino1612 helped me a lot with this so thank u (she basically wrote the majority of the fanfiction and letting my poor bias suffer this much was all her creation :( just kidding) ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ and go check out her account 
> 
> have a nice day  
-Lu
> 
> Actually, she's not kidding. I take full responsibilty for making San suffer so much, Lu is way too nice and loves him way too much to hurt him like that XD  
Check out her other works, her fanfics are amazing and I really enjoyed working with her~
> 
> I wish you a nice day as well, stay safe and love yourself
> 
> <3Yukino


End file.
